As I am writing this, I am reminiscing the times when we were single and free. See, she’s my sister from another mother. We met at the gym, took our BODYCOMBAT instructor module together and just connected right away! She was there at my career journey, my wedding, listened to my rants, bought me MCDs and food, taught me how to eat Kuay Teow Basah, introduced me to Ayam Golek, went food hunting and my makan partner and so much more! But that’s not it. This friendship is about acceptance. She accepted me for who I am, who I was, and has encouraged me at hard times. Thank you Zila babe, for being you. For who you are. Even though in those 10 years, we were having separate lives, at different stage of life, busy with work, family, we seldom see each other much. But I know when we do, we could talk for hours. Just like old times. Sitting in the car with AC and listening to Hispanic songs and just random stuff.
2012 after a gym session
If you’re reading this babe, THANK YOU! Thank you for your friendship over a decade and thank you for being such a significant part of my life. There are no words to express but when I look back, we’ve come a loooong way! I remember people saying “oh, your friendship isn’t going to last, just wait and see”. But HAH! Look where we’re at now!
Just before you went to China and before covid lockdown 2020
This is also a post to wish you a happy sweet 1st Anniversary! And this time, you get to celebrate with a tiny person together! I can’t believe we’re mothers now. And how amazing is it that we have children of the same age, just within a month or so. I don’t think it is by chance, but it was pre-destined! I can’t imagine what life would look like in the next decade. We’ll probably be talking about motherhood stuff and suddenly sing lullabies instead of Reggaeton, talk about how to wean off diapers instead of buying venum pants and boxing gloves, go to BKK to shop for all things for the kids but one thing for sure – our love for good food will never change!
So here’s to us. Here’s to motherhood. And here’s to walking down the memory lane.
Of course photos of our ultrasound scans and then a month before she “pops” is a must! Hopefully we can have one with out babies soon once we get to meet again face to face!
Dec 2011. Almost a decade, babe! Taken at my ROM and wedding day the week after
My sister from another mother
Of course, my all time favourite photo of us! Still is until today. Love you, Zila babe! Can’t wait to see you soon!
Honestly, it is right now a blur to me on how I felt in the second trimester. I can’t really remember what I did, or what happened or if there was anything significant that happened. I know we went for out first getaway of the year but that’s about it. I blame covid. In the middle of September, suddenly schools are closed again and I did not get to really go out or do the things I wanted to. I had the other kids to care for with online studies and so on. It was still stressful to a certain extent, although the pregnancy was going great. I guess I was so busy, I forgot that I was even pregnant!
Ok, let’s start with some major highlights as I check my journal to update important dates.
12th September 2020
YAY! Holiday bound and probably the best memories we had as a family (the kids talk about it all the time!). We went to Perhentian and stayed at Bubbles Dive Resort for 4 nights. It was a dream beach holiday, totally relaxing, detox from technology and just spending quality time together. I was 16 weeks that week and I remember celebrating a big milestone as I don’t feel sick anymore! If you’ve read my first trimester update here, you’d know that I was feeling so sick till about 14 weeks or so. On and off at 15, but by 16 weeks I was alright. I did not puke during the long drive there nor the boat ride etc. But, I was a little sea sick during the snorkeling session, haha! On a side note, we can’t wait to go back to Bubbles again this year with the new baby and spend some time with friends that we made while we were there. It was almost magical, just snorkeling right outside the resort and seeing sharks, eels, octopus, fish, crabs and all sorts of sea life right at our doorstep AND witness turtles laying eggs at the shore! Ahhhh, a little paradise getaway indeed.
28th September 2020
I FELT THE FIRST KICK! It was only a brief moment, on the right side, but definitely the first kick I ever felt and am very sure it wasn’t a muscle spasm. It is one of the pregnancy milestone that every mother would want to remember/feel during her pregnancy. The first kick. Thank you, Jesus!
Feeling baby kicks is an amazing experience!
2nd October 2020
It was KINGDOMCITY CONFERENCE weekend! We had a great time together with our Connect Family at Brickhouse Bukit Tinggi and I remember having a surge in energy. We had a great time soaking in the Word and presence of God and just spending time together. The kids had fun and we got to know each other better. This was one event that is so memorable as a church and I enjoyed every bit of it. I was about 18 weeks along. Starting to feel like myself again and reminding myself to trust what God is doing in our lives, despite the challenges at work, business and family.
14th October 2020
Detailed scan day! I was 20 weeks along when we did the detailed scan. This is the normal gestational period for the anatomy scan that is usually done between 18-22 weeks I believe? I went alone as Terence was at work because I scheduled it kinda late. The great thing about this event was that my scans were FREE! They are done by Vision College’s diagnostic team where they scan patients as case study and for practice. I came here during my last pregnancy too and found them very detailed and precise. The session does take long (about 2 hours) but hey, its FREE! Plus, the teacher and senior sonographer will come in to check and make sure everything goes well too. I also found out that detailed scans outside costs between RM200-400 per session! I was shocked but I am also so grateful to have found such services. Vision College not only scan for pregnancy, but also any other parts of the body like prostate, ovaries, etc. They are all free, so you can check them out and set an appointment too! If there was anything wrong, they will refer you to a hospital for follow up. During the scan, everything went well. I DID NOT plan to find out the gender, but I wanted to know if it can be seen clearly in the scans. I wanted them to write it on a piece of paper, just in case we want to find out later on. Coz why not, right? Since they said the couldn’t confirm the gender clearly, they said I could come back another time to confirm it. And since it is FREE and since Terence was not with me, I said yes. So I had another date schedule for another detailed scan done.
Hello there little one!
30th October 2020
It’s my birthday! I was feeling very down the day before because of some family matters that happened, so I decided to get out and do something so that I could have some sort of break. I pampered myself by going the salon. It’s been ages since I had done something to my hair (no thanks to covid), so I booked a session under a promo with fave. It wasn’t my usual stylist, but this was nearer to home so I just went for it. I know many pregnant women would not dye their hair or will stay away from these “chemicals” but honestly, I wasn’t worried about it. My understanding is that I am not exposed to it every day or anything and there are people who work in beauty salons (hairdressers, nail salon owners) who work in such places too. If they were pregnant, does that mean they stop working? So yeah, I went for it and I loved the outcome. Red has always been my vibe. Of course as I am writing this now, my mane doesn’t look the same anymore. It is high maintenance and it made my hair kinda dry. But hey, experience is everything. And I needed that distraction.
The next day, Daddy brought me out for dinner and we had Japanese. It’s been ages since we ate a nice Japanese meal together without the kids. Thanks to my sister who made this possible by babysitting the kids so that we could go out. Only sad thing was that Kampachi had no buffet that night. I was bummed, but since we made the reservation, we just ate a la carte dining anyway.
I turn 32. Feels surreal.
13th November 2020
We had our second detailed scan and Terence came along with me! I was 24+ weeks along and they confirmed the gender of the baby. No, we did not want to find out, so the sonographer write it on a piece of paper, folded it and I kept it in my wallet. Surprisingly, we could hold on for so long and I was not even tempted to open it and see. I guess I had set in my mind that I wanted a surprise on birth day and wanted something to look forward to during the labour process, I was willing to not find out and be surprised. Plus, it’s a “once in a lifetime” kinda thing right? I guess having a pair already, made me content enough that whatever gender it may be, we’d be so happy!
Washing dishes is a challenge because my shirt will get soaked!
5th December 2020
I was 27+ weeks here and going into the third trimester already. The reason I have this in my journal is because I felt the first contraction. It felt a little weird, because it was slightly painful. It could be Braxton-Hicks, but BH generally does not hurt. This one hurt a little and it lasted a few seconds. I wasn’t sure if I had a stomach ache or what. It went away after and from here, I welcome the third trimester.
22 weeks/25 weeks/27 weeks
It looks like my second trimester did have quite a bit of update after all. All I can say is that I logged all these events, but I remember feeling quite stressed with life and covid situations. Having both kids at home took a toll on me and suddenly wearing all the hats at home really made me feel so tired, lost, stuck and just going through the motions. Having said that, God has still been faithful. He has seen us through those times, He was provided for us still, He has open doors for my second business to grow and He was been watching over us 24/7. Thank you, Lord, that You had watched over us during this period and for giving us a healthy baby to look forward to. I can’t wait to update on the third trimester now because there was some incidents that happen – like how the doctor ACCIDENTALLY blurped out the gender of the baby at 33 weeks! More on that story later.
When you see that positive line on that pregnancy test, I’m not sure about you, but I immediately Googled creative ways to announce our pregnancy to the world! I know there’s some taboo going on about these announcements like not announcing till 12 weeks or even not announcing at all, etc. They all have valid reasons for them, but for me, I wanted to announce it when I feel ready. I announced my previous 2 pregnancies early (in the 1st trimester itself) because after having a failed pregnancy, it was heartbreaking to go through it alone. No one knew, no one could understand. So I was not one of them that wanted to keep the news off “just in case”. The reason I waited was just because I was so sick, I wanted to feel better before I can take pictures, make videos or whatnot.
The first thing I did was went online and bought a “Big Brother/Big Sister” shirt! I was so glad that they exists and I placed the order right away. And then it took awhile for me to decide how we should announce it. With #2, we took photos at the playground see-saw and added a note on the other end of the seat. We thought of doing it again but then there aren’t any playground rides that has 3 seaters.
How we announced Baby #2!
I could only think of that round turning thing that could stand 3 people. Or a swing set that as 3 seaters? But one has to be a “baby” one. But then again with covid and me being sick, I was just so tired and dread to go out. In the end, we decided to shoot a short video! I just used my phone and Daddy edited it. He did a great job! I just sent him all I had and have no idea how it’ll turn out. He was more excited than me on sharing the news, really! It’s a nice feeling to have, to know that your husband is so excited and can’t wait to tell the rest of the world.
A spinning turntable?
Or a 3 seater swing which was hard to find!
Some of the ideas I had in mind.
I shot the video on 23rd and 25th of July (8 weeks+ pregnant), and ended up using the roll we got on 25th. We share with family on August 6th (10 weeks+) and publicly a few days after. Just about the end of the first trimester, but I was still feeling VERY sick. The distraction of some nice comments and encouragement and congratulatory messages did keep me up and happy for awhile though, away from feeling all the nausea.
Here’s the short video we made to announce our anticipation for Baby #3!
Memories for us to cherish for a lifetime! Evie’s expression was priceless!
Those sibling shirts were bought from Shopee!
Can’t believe how time flew by this pregnancy (blame covid?), it is already February 2021! Still lotsa updates coming up soon, and how I enjoyed the second trimester.
So here’s where the pregnancy updates begin! I think I’ll update by the “trimesters” as weekly or even monthly will be a lot to read. PLUS, I think my first trimester was just horrible all the way through.
Right after the positive pregnancy test, I started to feel all the symptoms already by week 5. Seriously though, it started so early this time and I was feeling so sick and miserable. The first trimester started from 23rd June – 18th August, but I was still feeling sick till the end of August (literally!). The term “morning sickness” is proven inaccurate as it can appear any time of day! I would just prefer to call it “pregnancy sickness” instead. And one annoying symptom I have which is consistent with ALL my pregnancies is feeling my heartbeat in my ears when I lay down. This makes sleeping impossible and very uncomfortable. Lord, I am so thankful I am now writing this and not going through it again!
5th July 2020
This was the day that the pregnancy sickness struck so bad, I had to leave the fellowship happening downstairs to go up and lay down. Yes, we we’re hosting church at home! I prepared food, we had a great morning and even played games, and then suddenly I just disappeared! LOL! Dear Connect family, if you’re reading this, I am so sorry for that day. 5-minute Marvel was super fun but I was feeling very dizzy and queasy, I just needed to go up. And that was when Terence told the family that I was expecting! We didn’t plan to announce so early, but because I just disappeared, he had to tell. Plus, we love our Connect family very much and we knew they would understand. I remember making siew yoke to serve them and I couldn’t stand the smell! They loved it, but I was suffering, HAHA! I think I stayed away from siew yoke for the next couple of months!
Sorry no guide, just all day sickness!
15th July 2020
The past week has been super exhausting and not just tired but extreme exhaustion! There are no words to describe it, but it feels very unbearable. Felt like I was dying and of all my pregnancies, this was by far the worse and the hardest. I had nausea all day and was unable to eat or swallow my own saliva. When I lay down, my head would hurt and there is a tingling sensation at the back of my head along with spasms around the stomach area. I remember having to send and pick up Leo after school and I would cry in the car. I cried so much because I just cannot take it. I feel sick, almost OKU and I was so tempted to go to the hospital to just be admitted because I felt so weak. Terence bought some asam boi for me so that I’ll feel better.
17th July 2020
I actually went to Edibee at 3 Damansara and bought 2 different types of asam boi! It helped so much and it was all I wanted and all I could take to keep myself from vomiting.
Sudden loss of symptoms, YAY! I manage to eat dim sum (YUM!) and even went for a family dinner and Sunday church fellowship. I felt so good for a day, but unfortunately by night time, I was feeling weird and those cramping returned. I felt so exhausted by the end of the day.
20th-25th July 2020
I was still keeping up with my weekly Zoom workout with the ladies from the gym and some friends, and it didn’t feel too bad. Had sushi for lunch for the first time but had mild diarrhea after. By evening, I couldn’t eat again and everything tasted salty. Plus, I felt thirsty all the time! Looks like it’s a trend that by evening, the sickness will return even worse. When brushing your teeth becomes unbearable, as it make you gag so much that the little bit you could eat just wants to come back out! This sickness and exhaustion feels like a fever. It is the in between falling sick and being sick kinda situation. All day. Everyday.
21st July 2020
Yes, back track a few days from the above, we heard the baby’s heartbeat for the first time. All of us, the whole family! The sound of life is definitely reassuring and it is a sound that I look forward to each time. It is extra special, because I went through a miscarriage before back in 2012 where there was no heartbeat. That incident was blogged right here and you can read about it here.
3rd August 2020
We went for a family staycation and trip to Sunway Lagoon with another family from our Connect group! We wanted to bring the kids for some fun and also spend some time together and also celebrate Leo’s birthday. At first I was really worried that I wont be able to take it as I felt so sick but since we booked it, I told Terence I’ll be ok and if I wasn’t, I’ll just sit and rest. It turned out to be such a good distraction because I felt 0 sickness on this day and even went on water slides! EEEEKKKK, yes at 9 weeks pregnant! I wasn’t showing yet and no one would stop me. Plus, I love the adrenaline and distraction it gave me. Of course, I was extra careful not to overdo it or tire myself too much. We had such a fun day and I am so glad we did this trip together!
9 Weeks pregnant – slopping on water slides and fun with the fam!
5th August 2020
Oh hello and welcome back lethargy and sickness. Extreme exhaustion hit and all I could do was just “tahan”.
20th August 2020
Almost 12 weeks here but still feeling sick the past weeks. Honestly, sitting down to do work presentations was hard. I remember needing to puke after every session and had to swallow my saliva and talk very slowly. I knew I still had responsibilities but it was so hard to brace through those hard weeks. I wished I had a shoulder to cry on and just someone to vent on how hard this pregnancy is. But I guess everyone is busy, and I just kept things to myself. Went shopping with my sister and bought a pair of new comfy shoes! We walked a lot and my feet felt so tired after. By the end of the day, KO-ed pretty much.
I got Skechers’ Grumpy Cat shoes!
21st August 2020
Had our 12 week scan and everything looked great. Leo was with me and the baby was moving a lot. Having my firstborn to share these memories with is really something. I also had a dream this day. I dreamt that I delivered a baby boy and he weighed 2.95kg. The birth was fast and I had no tears. It’s true that you have strange and vivid dreams during pregnancy, but this one was pretty detailed I’d say.
So that was my first trimester. I realize that I did journal a lot during the first trimester because of how sick I was, and much lesser in the second trimester. Perhaps I was feeling better and was busy hence I did not update much. There are some significant moments, but just not as much as the first trimester.
Long story short, the weeks leading up to week 14 was hard. VERY HARD. Horrible and undeniably exhausting. I really did wish I had more support here from my fellow co-workers but then again, because we haven’t seen each other much due to restrictions, things just fell apart. I was too sick to pay much attention to some details and perhaps it is my fault for not being proactive. But as I write this and re-live back those moments, I just couldn’t. It was too much for me to bear, plus taking care of 2 other kids, plus an elderly at home, plus chauffeuring them here and there, I was a mess. I could not even make soap or watch soap making videos nor smell them! Can you imagine? It was just out of this world! I think Terence ordered food from Grab the most during this season as I couldn’t cook.
So yeah, this was by far the worse pregnancy sickness I had among all. I am not sure why? Maybe I am older, maybe I have other kids to care for, maybe it’s just the covid situations around. Maybe. While I know having some form of pregnancy sickness is a good sign, because it means that your body is producing those hormones well to support the pregnancy but I have more empathy now for those who suffer from severe morning sickness like HG. I can’t imagine what they suffered. Hugs to all the mamas who braced through that! If you did not have anything at all, you are super blessed!
NEXT UP is how we announced the pregnancy and the second trimester update! Stay tuned.
My Little Miracle 