39 weeks + 5 days…

Okay… so Leo has not made his entrance into this world as yet. I’ve always thought that he would come early. Just an instinct that I had all this while. I guess I was wrong and maybe he just feels so comfy in there and wanted to stay in longer.

However, I have lost my mucus plug and had a bloody show over about 2-3 days after the membrane sweep that Doc did at 39 weeks. The sweep was to help get labor going but I guess it did not quite work for me though I was dilated 2cm then. Again… he might do it at 40 weeks or schedule and induction. Personally, I do not want to be induced… there are a lot of things to consider when having it and especially what it could lead to. Have a look at this chart:-

But of course, we will keep our options open if something really needs to be done, for a healthy baby to come. A healthy baby and mommy is the goal at the end of pregnancy.

The past week has been an emotional cycle for me. The worst thing is that you can’t control it. I honestly feel like I am just getting bigger and fatter… waiting and waiting. Almost doing nothing. Some moms say

“better enjoy now until the baby comes… you wont have time to do what you want, can’t get sleep and you will be dreading it!”

SERIOUSLY?

That is NOT helping me feel any better! I want this baby and I want to hold him and cuddle him and after so long (+ a miscarriage last year), I just want to see this Miracle. Maybe yes, I will dread the sleepless nights and probably complain a whole lot about it, not trying to be smart and say no, I wont feel that way… but what I need now is really support and encouragement. Not telling me what I will dread after the baby and all the freedom lost!

Do you get what I mean? It feels like someone is robbing me of my excitement and joy wanting to see Leo actually being in my arms.

Anyway… God has a plan and purpose. He knows better and I’m sure Leo knows too. I’ve spoken to him and we prayed that he will be safe and strong. He has to come out eventually. Mommy is trying to stay positive and that all will work out well and fine as long as we trust in Him and place all our cares/concerns upon our Lord God.

To keep myself busy, I made my own nursing tank, washed and packed away EVERYTHING that will come in contact with baby when he comes home, cut out styrofoam letters of his name to be put in his nursery (yet to be painted)… and just hanging out. Oh, not to mention spending time with these 2! Black pig and white sheep 🙂

Dear Leonidas,
Do come out soon as Mama and Papa are so eager to meet you! Not to mention, your grandpas and uncles and aunties and the whole family! When you are ready to come see the world, do cooperate with my body during birth and make it an easy and painless one too. Know that we love you and we will be waiting for you.

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38 weeks and 4 days…

WOW! I am actually 38 weeks+ pregnant! And that means that baby can come anytime now. I am so thankful that he has reached full term and I know how important it is for that and everyday counts when he is in the womb. Protected, nourished, warm and growing!

However, honestly… I am feeling very tired and I really can’t wait to meet him. The past few days I was feeling really emotional. I cannot explain how it feels like. It’s like I KNOW I am emotional, I KNOW that I am complaining or fussing over small issues. I KNOW that I am over reacting… I KNOW… but yet, I can’t help it! I feel like I need to let it out.

At our 38 week check up, everything seems to be well but some things that the doc said made me anxious and I really do not want to feel stressed or worried. He said that my blood pressure was marginal. From the start of pregnancy, my BP was consistent and stable. Pretty good I’d say. Thanks to the workout that I kept doing and teaching classes. However, I stopped teaching by the end of June because I was feeling very tired and heavy. Sometimes my back and feet would hurt. Maybe because I stopped teaching, my BP went higher?

Also, during the scan he found calcium in the placenta. Not a good or bad thing, but preferably not be there. It is a sign that the placenta is ageing… that got me worried! I Googled it and found out that a little calcification is ok and it means that labour is near. Time for placenta to finish its job. According to what I’ve read, it would not harm the baby and will still provide sufficient nutrients to him. So because if this 2 concerns, I will see doc again at 39 weeks. I am really hoping though, that he will be born before the 39th week check up…

Feelings this week: I am in pain. I feel pressure and pain in my “hooha” a lot. It feels like a knife is stabbing me. Ok… not so dramatic, but it feels like sharp pain and I just need to stop for a second and take a deep breath! I have pain in my back too. No matter how I try to stretch, it does not go away! My legs feel numb every now and then. Numb as in… NUMB. Sudden loss of feelings in my legs. At first it was only once a while, but now it happens several times a day. Baby movements hurt. At the beginning of pregnancy, no it doesn’t hurt. But I guess now due to less “space” in me, every big movement makes me feel like I’m about to explode! I can literally feel his knees/feet poke me and his head down under, pressing my bladder and just pushing down towards my “hooha”. Don’t misunderstand that all these are bad. It is not. I love knowing that he moves, but it’s just getting more and more intense.

I know for sure he will be in our arms sooner or later. But waiting is getting harder and harder too. I’ve found out that a friend of mine had already given birth 2 days ago at 37 weeks and her due date was supposed to be 1 week after mine. Yes, due dates just estimates but still… knowing that I am the last person to deliver makes me feel so left out 😦 I had known at least 8 women who have had their babies already!!! Looking through their pictures and hearing their stories makes me feel so excited! And I wonder… when will little Leo make his appearance so I’d have a story to tell?

Next week I would be off work officially. I wanted to spend some time at home and just resting and not stressing about work. Thankfully I have friends who are helping me with work and allowing me to take time off. I am looking forward to longer sleeping hours and washing sheets, spending time with Chon and Milo (our 2 dogs) and just being at home, calm and focused.

Today, I spent all day with Terence and made dinner together too 🙂 I love doing things together and it makes me feel safe and secure having him around. I know being pregnant, I have thrown many fits around him, nagging constantly and just being a pain. I assured him that I will not be like this forever and it’s really the hormones taking a toll on me! I hope that after delivery I can be myself again, even better. Loving my husband, cherishing every minute spent together and practicing unconditional love. I know FOR SURE, he will be a great dad…

Dear Leonidas,
We are waiting for your arrival and we can’t wait to meet you! Mama want to hear your first cry, hold you in my arms, snuggle you, see you smile and look into your eyes. I know you will come when it’s time and God has already decided that for you. In the meantime, I love feeling you move and squirm in my womb. It makes me feel happy and thrilled that you are living inside me and only Mama can experience it! I know for sure I will miss that feeling once you’re out. So every minute now, I shall cherish your movements and I will love you and wait for you.

May God’s favour be upon you and may He continually bless you with good health and growth.

Cloth vs. Disposable

Finally, I have found some time to do this post! I have been wanting to do it for a long time, but needed to survey to get some actual facts right first.

Please note that this post doesn’t mean that I think disposable diapers are the worst choice or the most horrible thing any parent could do, but it is just a comparison in price and what is better for baby. Here you will find out how much an average family with one child would be spending on solely on diapers for the first 2 years until potty training.

From my research, I have taken 4 popular brands that Malaysians go for. Mamy Poko, Drypers, Huggies and Pet Pet. The amount of pieces in one pack differs between sizes. Smaller sizes are cheaper than bigger ones, and bigger ones has less pieces in one pack too. So for this comparison, I will take the M size as the average just so it is easier and it is in between Newborn-XXL sizes.

So here is the breakdown price for each of these (based on the average store – Tesco, AEON, Giant, Grocers, and some other general stores):-

Mamy Poko – M44 RM39.90

Drypers – M80 RM42.99

Huggies – M64 RM47.99

Pet Pet – M52 RM32.90

These prices are the average non-sale period. Sometimes they might be cheaper on sale but it depends. Certain stores might sell them way cheaper and some just sky high. If you ask me how come I did not compare with the cheapest price, well hey… when your baby needs it, he/she needs it. No time to wait for baby fairs or sale right?

So now I will get the average price for the disposables.

RM39.90 + RM42.99 + RM47.99 + RM32.90 = RM163.78

RM 163.78/240 pcs = 0.68 sen per piece

WOW!!! Imagine spending that on each diaper change!

Okay, now let’s see what I have bought so far on my cloth diaper stash (referring to my previous post)

6 Rumparooz – RM200

6 Bumgenius – RM300

6 Charlie Banana – RM330

6 Raf Raf Baby – RM350

6 QQ Baby – RM100

2 Luvable Friends – RM50

Simplex, ShiEzy, Bumgenius prints and elemental, Bumkins was bought under a promo pack and it costs – RM518.

And… recently bought 5 2nd hand Grovia newborn diapers 🙂 – RM90

Total = RM1,938.

Please also know that in buying these great cloth diapers I had some free ones that came along too. In my previous post I mentioned I have a total of 44 cloth diapers. So adding the 5 Grovia newborns would make 49. These 49 can be used from birth till potty training, which we estimate about 2 years.

Here’s the answer! Are you ready???

Baby probably use less when they are older and about 12 as an infant. Average would be about 8 disposables a day. 2 years would be 730 days.

Disposables = RM0.68 X 8 X 730 = RM3,971.20

Cloth = RM1,938

Difference of RM2,033.20!!! Now isn’t that double???

Please also know that potty training might take more than 2 years and you could be spending even more on diapers. Oh and not forgetting, this is for 1 BABY… What if we have another baby? Cloth can be reused if taken care properly. This means another RM3,971.20 of savings!!! The cloth diapers I have are considered the good/imported ones. If you get the cheaper ones (which works just as well), you could save even more money.

Well, it is true that these disposable brands are the expensive brands but it is also of what other moms use. The cheap ones do not absorb as much and cause rash on baby a lot. Not forgetting, cheap disposables leak! You can also do the same comparison but using cheaper brands, but I believe it will not be any much different than the RM2,033.20 saved.

So there ya go… the truth. A family can save so much more money if use cloth diapers. Surely we will use more water and electricity to run the washing machine to wash those diapers and special detergents, but are they really at such a high cost? You can also sell those diapers once you don’t use them anymore. There is nothing wrong in reusing them as baby’s wastes are natural and all just the same.

Even if you do not cloth diaper fully, and doing it partially you still can save lots! And maybe when you’re on vacation or a long trip, just use disposables. Cloth is not only better for the environment, it is better for baby’s skin and health too. That is what I want for Leo and what I am willing to work for.

I will admit that disposables are attractive too when on sale but control what you buy. Use them as emergency diapers and spares if need be. I really don’t wanna be “kiasu” fighting over diapers during baby fairs and sales. It is madness!

Anyway, it is up to you to decide and there is no right or wrong. I am not judging anyone. if I can help change someone else’s thoughts on a way to save money when they are starting a family, this would be it. I am so glad to have found great cloth diaper stores here in Malaysia and the research I did through YouTube. I learnt a lot and realized that there is so much to save and having a baby is not all about having enough money. It is a joy to start a family and there should not be anything to hold anyone back.

If you have questions, do post them below and ask. I’d be happy to answer them 🙂